Overscheduling...Take Two
Daniel McGinn penned an interesting look at a yet to be released study that contradicts the popular notion that children are overscheduled in this week's Newsweek, as did Barbara Meltz in her column in the Boston Globe.
I can't wait to see the findings of the study, but apparently it reveals that children who have more activities scheduled do better in school, have stronger relationships with their parents and are less prone to substance abuse.
I'm a big fan of activities. So I grapple a lot with this idea of "overscheduling" and I think what it really comes down to is that no one can argue that having children participate in organized activities is bad. My own daughters spend hours per week in gymnastics, horse riding and soccer and get a lot out of the experiences, even if it is tiring and leaves less time for togetherness at home.
However, there are three important points that need to be considered regarding the topic:
1. Make sure your kids are plugged into the right activities. Schedule for schedule's sake is pointless. My oldest daughter wore out on ballet, and while we were prone to sign her up again, we realzied she had just lost interest in it, even though she was one of the best dancers in the class. She didn't care about it anymore. And to continue with it would have been wrong. My youngest loves to ride horses, but it's expensive. But she lights up like a bulb when we get to the barn. She's at her best around a horse.
2. Overscheduling is a real problem for families with more than one child. No, it may not be too much for child #1 to be in 2 activities, but if child #2 is also in 2 activities, then the wear factor kicks in. Even though one child isn't participating in all four activities, (s)he is likely being dragged to it and waiting it out, which is a commitment on their part and takes away from their free time.
3. Overscheduling can send parents over the edge. When you're the chauffeur, those mini van hours McGinn refers to rack up and take a toll. Not to mention the stress of getting out of the house on time, making sure we have all the equipment, hitting the bathroom before we leave, etc. All of that is mental and physcial stress on the parents that often is transferred to children through "Hurry up" and "We don't have time for this" statements.
More thoughts when the study releases, but in the meantime, how does it paly out in your household?
posted by dadinprogress @ 1:43 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Chiming in late, but I just found you!
I have 3 boys - 9,7,4. This is the slow time of year for us - the 9 yr old and the 7 yr old each have one activity right now. And that is still plenty of chasing around.
During summer they also had swimming and baseball, so we were constantly on the go. And soon they'll start again with basketball and soccer. It's nice to get out of the house (and avoid the constant fighting and trashing of the house), but all the chasing around gets old. And it's a pain trying to deal with my 4 yr old during his big brothers' activities - he's running off, or having a meltdown, or needs to use the bathroom, is tired and crabby, etc.
My youngest, 4, has so far NEVER been signed up for ANYTHING! But I don't think I'll be able to put that off much long. Once he starts activities too, the older two will have to cut back, and they'll need to make some tough choices. I hate to restrict them too much, but going to one or two activities in one day is the limit! And we all need a day off now and then.
momto3cubs -- it's tough, isn't it? we got a flier for my older daughter to join girl scouts, and we'd really like for her to do it because of what she can learn and do, and she's not too keen on it right now, but she also doesn't know much about it yet. but then we wonder if it's too much time commitment for her. we have a hard enough time getting through the homework and reading a couple books before bed as it is.
oh, and take that day off soon!
So I have to raise the question... sure overscheduled kids *may* do better in school, but by what measure?
Schools today are fantastic at measuring againt a specific set of memorized criteria, but are they truly learning? I don't know either way, but I don't want to jump onto the bandwagon here.
I'm also quite concerned that this generation of children has lost its sense of rebellion. Much of the social change for the better that we see in practice today came from the youth of a generation refusing to accept common practice from their parents. If we are raising children to reject rebellion, how are things to move forward?
(And yes, I do realize I'll be regretting those words shortly after the baby arrives.... :))
Jake
communityguy.com
an interesting point, Jake. the thought of my children rebelling isn't necessarily appealing, so I don't know that I'd encourage it. But perhaps there is a subtle and positive difference between rebels and leaders. I want my children to be comfortable enough to speak up, to chalelnge norms and to be the people they want to be. I have the same personality, and it's not because I was encouraged to be rebellious, but I think truthfully because I was an unconstrained, curious, creative explorer as a child. My parents gave me plenty of opportunity to be free and roam, to see things differently and celebrate my perspective. My fear, in today's world, is I can't justify allowing my children to roam free, but diligently supporting and celebrating their creative spirits is a step in the right direction.
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